Daemons [EN]

I no longer know what I am, the one who smiles so much is not happy, why did God make me like this? A broken person, I ask my father for forgiveness, my mother I wish prosperity and my friends and brothers I wish their dreams come true. I feel a lot of anger, without feeling it, I’m tired of existing, feeling and smiling; and if only it were so easy to be on this edge of absurdity. I’m ready, finally ready, to jump in and be able to tell everyone that things are no longer the same, that I’m ready to be celebrated at the next All Souls’ Day; I am ready to carry out my epitaph: I was never who people wanted to be, nor was I what I wanted to be; I was who the world wanted me to be, I’m tired of being so flawed. I’m tired of being a pointer to the void, I’m tired of the news and wars; Not even Paris is what it used to be. I miss who I was, the apathetic and dull boy who gave birth to a star but, with its consequences, became your worst enemy, yourself and feel angry about small things without knowing the reason, regret it soon after and You don’t know when that will change. Whatever it is, I wonder if there is something that still watches over me, no matter where, I hope this is all normal and that I won’t regret it later.